I need a periscope on my car. A flea amid bricks is what I am. But I don't have a periscope. Or even radar. When I back out of a parking space, my head is whipping back and forth like I'm being taken over by a Matrix Agent. It's the world of the Yacht on Wheels, and I can't see for squat. And if I'm pulled up to a cross street and need to make a turn--left or right--odds are that the asteroid next to me will be pulled out as far into the cross street as possible so I can't see around the looming escarpment of their hood. Meanwhile the people in the bouncing hovercraft behind me can't understand what my holdup is. After all, they're 20 feet off the ground and can see just fine that there aren't any cars coming. 'Honk-honk, you shrimpy, loser Honda car driver.' ohh, but if I had a periscope, I'd show them all. It would have fisheye and zoom lenses, for maximum versatility, and would project on a heads-up display. Thumbstick controls would be on the steering wheel. I'd back out of hedged-in parking spaces like nobody's business. I'd make turns from out of the sheer, intersectional grottos smooth as butter on a wookie pelt. I'd be a hero in my own mind.
I am frustrated, as if you couldn't tell.
It snowed the big pretty snow today. No sticking though.
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