Scarlet J

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The Flagstaff newspaper lists DUI arrests on a daily basis as a deterrant by way of embarrassment sort of thing. A lot of folks I know dive right over to that section as soon as the paper pops out of the rubber band. I guess it's like if the horoscopes aren't your bag, then the DUI list is the proxy. And with a town this size, odds are you're going to run across a name you know on a somewhat regular basis. Makes for good conversation starters. "Hey, did you hear about Anna Gleeb's son-in-law Garret? Yeah, got pulled over for EXTREME DUI night b'fore last. Myyyy starrrrrs. tsk. What's that family coming too..." Garret needs help. But now Mrs. Gleeb gets to deal with the funny looks and wonder about the whispery conversations when she walks by too. I'm not sure how I feel about the public stockade thing.

Well anyways, I heard Amanda and a friend of ours cackling on the phone this morning, and shortly thereafter was directed to this morning's DUI section. Out of the five people listed, we can distill down to:

Jeremy John, 24, of Tuba City, was arrested by Flagstaff police and charged with extreme DUI at 10 p.m. Sunday.
Jeremy H. Perez, 24, 3784 E. Foxtail, was arrested by Flagstaff police and charged with extreme DUI at 1:30 a.m. Monday.
Jeremy L. Anderson, no age listed, 1401 N. Fourth St., was arrested by Coconino County sheriff's deputies and charged with DUI Saturday.

First the triple-Russ thing last week, and now this. It's that middle one that has me worried though. Most people don't know my middle initial is P, so I can just hear it now: "Martha, did you see Jeremy's name in the paper this morning? Locked up for DUI! I never would've suspected. Do you think that was him? Maybe it's a different Perez? But what are the odds? Do they live over in Country Club? He is a little too bald and marshmallowy to be 24 years old. Might not be him. I'd be too embarrassed to ask though. Poor Amanda. mm mm mmm..." etc.

I know. I take things too far. It's always got to be about me, etc., etc., gag.

4 Comments

Do you think its him? Oh honestly, no wonder he was riding his bike to work. It is all coming together now. And have you heard about the work place antics and the LOOOONG bathroom breaks. It wouldn't surprise me if he was in there with the nail polish remover...

it's sad really.

... and yes it is all about you

... and yes it is all about you

Will you write my daily affirmations for me, Sancho?

Well, C'mon! How many Jeremy Perez's could there possibly be? Well, er, um, let me restate that, How many Jeremy Perez's could there possibly be in this state, uh, I mean city?? And you know, besides, the paper is always making typographical errors. It just has to be him. It HAS to be him.

It must of been one heck of a Superbowl party, that's all I can say.

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